First written in 2019, this updated reflection explores what truly helps traumatised people heal. Through compassion, co-regulation, and safe connection, our nervous systems can learn to settle again. Healing isn’t about fixing what’s broken. It’s about remembering what safety feels like and finding our way back to ourselves.

The freeze trauma response can feel like being shut down, numb, or unable to act. It’s the body’s way of protecting itself when fight or flight aren’t possible. The nervous system slows everything down to keep us safe. But when freeze becomes the default response, it can limit how we live, work, and connect with others.

The WHO recommendation is clear: once rates climb above 15%, more caesareans do not save more lives. Instead, they begin to create new risks.

Our bodies hold more wisdom than we often realise. Sometimes, the sensations, tensions, or emotions that arise aren’t random, they are reminders of trauma stored in the body. Learning to listen to these signals can guide us towards deeper healing and wholeness.

We inherit much more than eye colour or temperament from our families. We also carry emotional patterns, belief systems, attachment styles, and nervous system responses that were shaped by generations before us. The most empowering truth I’ve come to know is that we don’t have to stay stuck in these inherited patterns. With the right support, it’s possible to identify what you’ve been carrying for others, and gently begin to release it.

Sometimes talking just isn’t enough. You might understand why you react the way you do. You may have read all the right books and even had helpful conversations with therapists, friends or support groups. But still, something in your body keeps pulling you back into the same patterns. The same fears. The same emotional pain.

Pregnancy after birth trauma can stir up intense emotions, flashbacks, and anxiety. But you don’t have to go through it unsupported.

Whether your birth was traumatic, unexpectedly medicalised, or simply not what you’d hoped for, the grief can be quiet and heavy. It may not be visible to others. But it’s real.

For many women, especially those who’ve experienced trauma, these patterns are often chalked up to “being scatterbrained,” “anxious,” or “just overwhelmed.” But what if there’s more going on beneath the surface?